Know Your Worth: 7 Changes You Need To Make Right Now
It’s all too common to have those around us put us down so that they feel better about themselves. If it happens often enough we may start to think of these negative views as being true so it’s important to break the cycle early. Leila Dorari looks at 7 ways you can change your view of yourself (and others) so that you can begin to truly value yourself.
Sometimes the most difficult journey in life is one that takes us inward, that makes us come face to face with our inner demons and forces us to take a stand lest we lose ourselves completely. On this journey, there will be many pitfalls, many truths we will most-likely be unwilling to acknowledge. In order to re-evaluate our lives and figure out what needs to be done, we have to make the hard choices in life – whatever they might be. It’s not going to be easy, but it is going to make us happy in the end, and that’s all that matters.
1. Gauge The Situation
First and foremost, we need to be aware of our surroundings. We need to take a step back, breathe in, and take a good, hard look at what we’ve surrounded ourselves with. This does not mean we should set up a binary system of “this is good” and “this is bad”. On the contrary: most of our life will fall into the grey areas, as it should. However, this is precisely why it is easy to overlook very big problems right in front of us.
Don’t be afraid to dig deeper and look at the reasoning behind your thoughts and feelings, pretending everything is okay will just eat you away even more and make it more difficult for you to change those thoughts in the future.
2. Set Your Standards
As pretentious as it might sound, we still need to keep our standards high. Only by doing this will we be able to filter out the people that are dragging us down with them. This doesn’t imply that everyone has to possess certain traits to be kept around us, but they do need to have redeeming qualities and reasons for being there.
This applies to family members as well. The phrase “you can choose your friends but you can’t choose your family” might hold true, but we can sure as hell block them and exclude them from our lives if all they bring us is negativity. We’re only given one shot in this short life so never let anyone dictate how you are to live your life, family or not.
3. Don’t Undervalue Yourself
This essentially goes along with the point mentioned above, we need to be aware of our qualities and search for people that compliment those accordingly. If we constantly undervalue ourselves in order to easily find friends and companionship, we’ll end up feeling unhappy as we’re essentially living a lie.
Whatever our qualities may be and in whatever quantity, they are ours and no one can take that away from us. The wonders of the internet have managed to connect complete strangers and show them that they are far from alone in the world. External affirmation is crucial for this and this is why we should only surround ourselves with quality people – so they can bring out the best in us.
4. Set Goals
When we’ve figured out who we are and who our friends are, we need to set up milestones. These will help segment the journey ahead of us and make the journey seem easier than it is. With clear goals in mind, we’ll have something to strive for, a purpose. Having this sort of drive is extremely beneficial for our mental wellbeing and we’ll get a sense of accomplishment as we pass milestone after milestone. Each stepping stone will get us one step closer to rooting out the cause of our discontent.
5. Filter Out The Bad Seeds
This has to be the hardest part of the journey, letting people go. This can be anyone from a friend to a family member. When marriage is concerned and separation is the only answer, there are plenty of Sydney lawyers that deal with these issues and will be more than happy to offer advice or lend a hand if need be. Rooting out the bad batch is never easy and is rarely painless, but it needs to be done. Nothing is meant to last forever and people change, just because someone was good for us last year doesn’t mean they’re good for us now.
6. Use Body Language
The final part of asserting ourselves is a bit subtler – body language. By figuring out what your posture and hand gestures say about you, you’ll be able to reshape yourself from the ground up and substantially influence the way other people look at you. Body language is a powerful tool and will help us convey our thoughts and opinions more openly. This will surely attract likeminded individuals or at the very least have other people start taking us seriously
7. Love Yourself
Short and simple – love yourself. We need to stop going in circles and focus on ourselves, our own happiness and our own wishes. Life is short, we really do not have a lot of time to spend finding ourselves and trying to be happy. With all the responsibilities of being an adult, happiness becomes just an idea instead of a goal. This needs to change, in order for our lives to change, we have to be willing to change with them – this change will not be easy and will certainly not come without a price – but it will be worth it.